There are many activities your loved one still enjoys doing. Many touch on or relate to pleasures they have enjoyed their entire life. They are able to experience the same contentment as they always have. We just need to remove the portions that are beyond their cognitive scope.
I have comprised a list here beyond the “normal” list of activities. These are all good regardless of what stage of dementia the loved one may be experiencing. If it appears they don’t like one, don’t throw it out, just try it again another day.
Over 200 Things to Do Together
- Unravel a sweater Cut construction paper into various shapes
- Folding paper bags Wash a window
- Eat chocolate covered cherries together Lace up shoes
- Stir a compost pile Cut pictures from magazines. Make a scrapbook
- Wax a pair of skis Clean tools
- Look through catalogues Clean golf balls
- Sort colored golf tees Wash the car
- Sit in the shade Walk in the rain
- Smash bananas for banana bread Glide in a glider rocker
- Make a snowball Match plastic containers with lids
- Scatter chemical-free fertilizer in the yard Organize a briefcase
- Rice potatoes File papers
- Make a photo memory book Make breadsticks out of frozen bread dough
- Watch the Honeymooners Frost cupcakes
- Dunk donuts in milk or coffee Watch The Sound of Music
- Shred carrots for a salad Hold a stuffed animal
- Fluff pillows Put address labels on envelopes
- Listen to a tape of favorite songs Say a prayer together
- Tuck a baby doll into bed Crank the handle on an ice cream maker
- Look at animal magazines Watch The Music Man Movie
- Hold a smooth rock Drink “near” beer
- Polish boots Sing Christmas Carols (anytime of year)
- Mash potatoes “Test” a baby bottle
- Put a hand under warm running water Read Chinese fortune cookies
- Shake salad dressing Top a pizza with cheese
There’s more to do!
- Hold a baby on their lap Blow kisses
- Crush herbs to smell Shake out a rug
- Watch home movies Give a hand massage with scented lotion
- Pet a kitten or puppy Fold plastic bags
- Turn a handle on a food grinder for tomato sauce Sand a chair down to bare wood and paint it
- Dance Bring the backyard indoors to touch and smell
- Browse through travel magazines Exercise
- Empty a waste paper basket Sample fruits
- Sort coins Fold newspapers to recycle
- Visit a neighbor Sharpen a pencil
- Pound a stake into the ground Tie a rope knot
- Feel the breeze Work a crossword puzzle
- Stir pancake batter Sort poker chips
- Listen to rain on the roof Make a bed
- Twirl dance in a wheelchair Write out a grocery list
- Draw a face on a jack o’ lantern Pound tenderize a steak
- Watch an animal documentary Pick low hanging fruit
- Roll a pie crust Polish silver
- March in place Look at family slides
- Decorate a birthday cake Wind a clock
- Toss a salad Mix fruit and yogurt together
- Brush the dog Eat ice cream cones
- Rummage in a safe drawer Fly a paper airplane
- Wipe off place mats Try on hats
- Straighten books Pack a suitcase
The list goes on!
- Take apart a small appliance Put groceries away
- Tie a tie Be a “helper”
- Hang necklaces on a rack Hang belts by the buckle
- Sort spools of thread Tidy up a corner of the room
- Put on jewelry Hang up clothes on a hook
- Look at old cards Stack little boxes
- Scrub potatoes in their skins Fold napkins
- Dig a hole Smooth a lap robe
- Shake hands Hand wash a blouse/shirt
- Roll yarn into balls Grow a carrot or potato top
- Churn butter Check out old spark plugs
- Tell a war story Eat breakfast food at dinner time
- Feel and look at lace Sip a favorite drink through a straw
- Dunk donuts Take a sales order
- Laugh at a joke Type
- Have Chinese food delivered for dinner Sift cornmeal
- Sort washers and wingnuts Sort laundry by colors and whites
- Make honey butter Make soap suds
- Water the lawn Listen to windchimes
- Oil work boots with mink oil “Add” on an adding machine
- Make a shopping list Look at recipe cards
- Put face powder on with a powder puff Toss confetti
- Dust with a feather duster Put on suntan lotion
- Plant a bulb Line a muffin tin with liners
- Juice a lemon Role dice
And finally…
- Play ring toss Fill peat pots with dirt and seeds
- Water spray plants Watch a windsock sway
- Taste condiments Clean lawn mower engine
- Pull apart cotton Take a picture with Polaroid camera
- Fold a flag Sand a door edge
- Bowl in the backyard Brush/comb hair
- Putt on indoor putting green Put hands in a box of packing pellets
- Spread bar cookie batter in pan Scatter wildflower seeds in dirt
- Suck on flavored ice Read a letter from a friend or write one
- Crush pine needles and put in warm water Trade baseball cards
- Toss leaves into the wind Stack plastic patio chairs
- Dial a rotary phone Polish a doorknob
- Wind fishing line on a reel Do “show and tell”
- Give a compliment Stack pegs on a pegboard
- Knead bread Dry dishes
- Lick the bowl and spoon while cooking Stack plastic cups and plates
- Sit by the fire Sign checks to “pay bills”
- Rearrange flowers Cut fabric into quilt squares
- Rake the leaves Cuddle
- Have impromptu picnic, inside or out Sweep the sidewalk
- Play tic-tac-toe Bring in the mail
- Fly a kite Clean out a closet
- Bring in firewood Match mittens and gloves
- Sit on the porch Tear old clothes for rags
- Put up a birdhouse Stir up some Jello
- Shuck corn Go for a ride in the car
- Scour a sink Watch for mail to be delivered
- Put on flavored lip balm Toss a “koosh” ball
- Squeeze a Nerf ball Look at a scrapbook
- Fold warmed towels and washcloths Work a giant-size jigsaw puzzle
- Watch fish swim in a tank Play marching CD and march around
- Watch a cartoon Play with hand puppets
- Sort buttons Read Sunday comics
- Blow bubble outside Wash kitchen countertop
- Put a tablecloth on a table Try on jewelry
A “thanks” to my activity resources
This list was compiled from a variety of resources I discovered along my professional journey. Some come from family members, staff, friends of the family, online, my own ideas, and just about anywhere else. Reading the different activities on this list may inspire your own imagination.
And remember, because their brain is changing they may like a project now that you would never have guessed they would go for.
Activities come in all shapes and sizes
Is your loved one showing signs of boredom? Women always delight in folding warm washcloths and towels. Washing/drying dishes and wiping down countertops and tables is an enjoyable pastime too. I might add sweeping floors and arranging plastic or real flowers in vases are popular favorites as well.
Men tend to find contentment in sanding blocks of wood, working with safe tools on projects and building birdhouses from kits. Most men enjoy taking apart small appliances. You can easily pick them up at any secondhand store. Some men enjoy building car, boat, and train models too. In addition men, like their counterparts, enjoy feeling the warmth while folding just dried-laundry as well.
For arthritis sufferers, folding warm laundry greatly benefits their quality of life. Offering mild reprieve from the chronic pain, without the need for harmful medications.
Some “just don’t like” activities
Occasionally I would work with a resident who did not like activities. They were by their own definition not crafty and one of the few who didn’t care for Bingo. Some are barely able to tolerate sitting in an activity room with other residents without their anxiety levels rising.
Just because they don’t like what is offered doesn’t mean they don’t get bored throughout their day if not kept busy. Something has to be done. Time to think outside the box.
Turns out one resident, Clifford, finally “found” his pleasure. He daily filled the bird feeders and cleaned out weeds from between the patio slabs in one locked facility’s courtyard. I would help him, following his instructions to the letter. Very cathartic for him.
Activities with the dumpling gang
Another resident, Augustine, was losing all his senses. He had no family left and he never received visitors. Sitting alone in a darkened room with no external stimulation left him clinically depressed and openly spoke about suicide. I had to find a way to rekindle a spark in Augustine’s life.
Finally I asked him what his dreams were. Maybe there could still be a spark of life in some not yet fulfilled aspiration. Augustine had a dream to open a “dumpling house.”
He still wholeheartedly believed his dumplings would take the world by storm. There’s his spark!
Together we began brainstorming plans to create his dumpling shop. These discussions not only kept his desire alive, it fueled hope for a better tomorrow. It was tremendous to watch Augustine “create” in his now well-lit room. Rounds of giggles could be heard at the completion of each new dumpling recipe.
Spies like us
Then there’s Riley. Other than an occasional van ride and going on lunch-bunch runs he too declined activities. But every morning he would come to my office to “talk.” You see Riley was an American spy during WWII working with General MacArthur in decoding secret messages.
As needed, according to Riley, General MacArthur would send him latitude and longitude coordinates denoting the location of their next meeting. There the two would discuss and exchange their highly privileged information in full spy fashion. Now many years later and in Stage II dementia, Riley continued to operate pretty much the same way.
Riley would sit on one side of my desk, me on the other. I would hand him pen and paper and he would write a message. Passing it quickly to me he’d say, “My people need to know what you think.”
“Maybe this will help. I don’t know,” I’d say while passing the note back. He would “read” it, scribble over every written word and destroy it, stuffing it into his shirt pocket to later secretly dispose of.
“You know how much I need to buy Whidbey Island, Riley. You alone know how my people need this. Maybe tomorrow we can close a deal,” I would assure him. “Yeah, maybe tomorrow we can wrap this up. Then we’ll do lunch. My treat,” he’d promise.
Every day this event took place. His reality knew our meetings to be every bit as dangerous, risky, and heroic as meeting with MacArthur. None of the normal activities could hold a candle to this.
Psychosocial Encouragement
- Validate their feels by echoing back their own words: “You are too tired to watch a movie tonight?”
- Express your love to them.
- Give them choices, not orders: “Would you like to eat chicken strips or a hamburger?”
- Give them household tasks to accomplish
